Why Do I Have No Sex Drive?
Did you know that more than one in five people experience low libido, or no sex drive at all? It’s true! While the loss of libido can sometimes be evident to you or your partner, unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. At times, our bodies might be giving us indications that we are unaware of. If you’re reading this article today, chances are that you’re looking to boost your libido and your sex life once again, whether for the health benefits of sex, sex’s erotic pleasures, or both.
But what causes low libido, really? Today, we’re delving into the various reasons that can be causing your low sex drive to help you better understand the signs your body might be giving you.
Your hormones are off
Did you know that your hormones can significantly affect your sex drive? Estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone contribute to a person’s sexual desire and sex drive, meaning that varying levels can either boost or decrease libido. This can result from medications (more on that in a bit), ageing, surgeries such as hysterectomies, and pregnancy. The desire to have as much sex after kids might dwindle, but it can be worked through if both partners are willing and consenting!
You’re experiencing health-related problems
Your body deserves self-love and self-care through a balanced diet and regular exercise. Fruits and veggies, sufficient protein, and whole grains are necessary to avoid spikes and drops in sugar levels, leading to fatigue and unstable moods, while exercise helps increase energy and boosts endorphins — the feel-good hormone.
There are also regular health checks for people with vaginas and penises alike; being aware of new health concerns may help pinpoint loss of your sex drive. This includes learning how to safely have sex when you (or your partner) have a sexually transmitted infection.
Your medications are affecting you
For many people, a loss of libido might be tied to their prescription medications, which may have a side effect of decreased sex drive. Some such medications include antidepressants with selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and anti-anxiety drugs like Valium and Xanax. Diuretics, pills that ease heartburn, and blood pressure medication may also be a source contributing to low libido. Before deciding to change any critical medications, however, we strongly urge you to consult your doctor first (as these medications may be essential to your health).
Your mental health is strained
A person’s mental health — including (but not limited to) anxiety, depression, and PTSD — can profoundly affect them, replacing feelings of intimacy and safety with stress and fearfulness. While counselling can be an effective way to build or rebuild coping skills needed in daily life, you can also learn to manage anxiety through meditation, deep breathing, finding journaling prompts to improve your mental health, and other reflective methods. Folks who recognize the signs that they’re in an abusive relationship, or who have experienced rape or sexual violence in the past, should take the time they need to heal before engaging in sexual activities once again.
You’re too distracted
Stress can be a significant factor contributing to someone’s low sex drive. Distracting thoughts about work, school, chores, and other tasks or future events that need to be completed can detract from their interest in sex and their sexual partner. If this is the situation that you find yourself in, something as simple as setting aside a set amount of time each day to decompress and focus on your romantic relationship can work wonders in boosting your libido.
You’re no longer attracted to your partner
Unfortunately, what causes low libido can be, for some folks, a lack of attraction to their sexual partner (yes, even if you still love them). Before you decide to call it quits, you may choose to try to find ways to have a better relationship. This can include switching up your routine by having morning sex instead of sex before bed, having sex in public, and striving for more intimate and mindful sex. Some people may wish to try couples therapy as well, in addition to finding new ways to seduce one another!
By being aware of what causes low libido, including certain health concerns (such as doing regular health checks for people with penises or vaginas, depending on what you’ve got), shifting towards a more sex-positive attitude, and practicing self-love to be your most confident, a low sex drive (or even no sex drive) can become less of a concern.
While experiencing low libido is nothing to be ashamed of, it’s something that can be improved and perhaps even wholly overcome over time.
Have you experienced no sex drive in the past? What did you do to overcome the loss of libido? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.