Having Sex in Public: A Comprehensive Guide
The idea of having sex in public is a fantasy that many couples share. Though it can be as risky as it is thrilling, public sex remains an incredible way to build intimacy with your partner, release large amounts of endorphins (a feel-good hormone), and do something out of your regular routine.
As if this wasn’t incentive enough, we’ve compiled a comprehensive guide on how to have sex in public. By referencing this list, you can make the most of your next big adventure in an electrifying (and safe) way.
Place a mirror near your bed
If you’re still acclimatizing to how to have sex in public, this is the ideal place to start. Place a full-length mirror near where you will have sex, the reflection facing you and your partner to give you both an entirely new view of your bodies. This will allow you to feel like someone is watching you, without any strangers acting standing in as voyeurs.
As you look at your reflection in the mirror, get used to the feeling of being ‘watched,’ even if the eyes staring at you are your own. This will play a critical role in adapting to what it will be like having the gaze of unknown patrons potentially trained on you. Once you get over the societally-prescribed ‘taboo’ nature of it, it can start to feel thrilling.
Start at home with the windows open
Though it’s not quite outdoor sex, starting in the comfort of your own home can be a great way to get used to the idea of moving things beyond your four walls. Whether it’s in your bedroom, living room, kitchen (or any other room in the home), crack the window open and, if you’re feeling particularly brave, draw the curtains back.
Though this means that you do not actually have to have sex in public — that is, in a shared space where other people might walk in on you — building up to it at home can be just as thrilling. Just think about who might catch a glimpse of you and your partner, or who will hear your moans as you both reach climax.
It’s a pretty hot thought, no?
Remember that there are (legal) risks
Thinking about moving things outdoors and having sex in public? Be aware of the legal consequences that may be in store, should you get caught. In section 173 of the Criminal Code of Canada, this could be considered “an indecent act in a public place in the presence of one or more persons.” However, keep in mind that different countries have different rules, as well as varying definitions of what constitutes an “indecent act.”
Only when you have concluded that the benefits outweigh the potential risks, should you then venture to have public sex. After all, if you spend the entirety of your time on what should an exciting rendezvous terrified of getting caught, there’s really no point in it at all. There’s a difference between the exhilaration of potentially being caught and straight out fear.
Take things as slowly as you need
If you really want to ‘learn’ how to have sex in public, an essential thing to remember is to take things at your own pace. Whether this is taking things extremely slowly — potentially never going further than a full-length mirror in your bedroom or opening the windows up — or jumping straight to voyeurism rooms at a sex club, make sure that you are comfortable with whatever decision you are making.
Remember: a lot of couples enjoy a little bit of exhibitionism, but that doesn’t mean that you should feel coerced into trying it, if that is not something you feel at ease or safe doing. At the end of the day, the choice is yours and your partner’s to make together.
Try out a locked, enclosed public space
When you first decide to have sex in public, you’ll likely want to start with baby steps. Think of places that are technically in public, but are not putting you on display for anyone to walk in on potentially.
Closed spaces (with a lock on the door) like single public washrooms, clothing store fitting rooms, and outdoor showers at the beach are all great starting points for feeling more comfortable with the idea. Even a private sauna at a spa or wellness centre is a steamy place — both literally and figuratively — to get it on.
Though these situations will likely mean that the sex will be standing up and have to finish relatively quickly, the thrill of your exploits will linger throughout the remainder of the day.
Have sex in a parked car
This is the kind of thing that can work both for newbies as well as veterans of public sex. If the idea of having public sex, right out in the open, feels a little too traumatic for your liking, why not try a more ‘private,’ subdued version of it? How about having sex in the backseat of a parked car?
Drive out somewhere secluded, with little chance of someone walking in on you. Think along the lines of parking garages or secluded parking lots after hours.
You can amp things up by changing the where and when, from unfrequented spaces during off-hours to popular areas in the middle of the day. That’s bound to up the risk-factor and possibly lead to more eyes landing on you.
Take advantage of nightfall
Maybe it’s in a park or on a beach. Either way, taking advantage of the darkness that nighttime provides is a must.
With a lack of illumination — save for, maybe, a well-placed streetlight — you and your partner have all the protection from prying eyes that you need. However, you don’t have to trade that in for the thrill of having sex in public. After all, you’re still out in the open, and thus, there always remains a chance of being seen.
To make things even hotter, opt for easily maneuverable pieces of clothing, like loose dresses or skirts, or pants with elastic waistbands. Eliminate any underwear to make things even easier to recuperate from, should anyone happen upon your secret hiding place.
Enjoy the great outdoors
Whether you’re walking through the forest or going on a camping trip, you’re presented with a perfect opportunity for outdoor sex. Sneak off the trail of a conservation area and find a cozy spot to strip down in, under the shade of the trees. Make sure to bring along a blanket and watch out for poison ivy!
If you’ve decided to pitch a tent for the night (no pun intended), this is another great spot to have public sex without any spectators. So long as you don’t make too much noise, no one will suspect a thing. The best part? You can still enjoy the cool breeze at night, the sounds of nature, and the overall ambiance that comes hand-in-hand with being immersed in the great outdoors.
Watch the city from a private roof deck
Next time you want to feel as if you are on top of the world, have public sex on a private rooftop. You can watch humanity go on as usual below you, oblivious to what is going on mere storeys above their heads. From this vantage point, you likely won’t have anyone looking in on you, which makes it an ideal open-air option for couples who are still nervous about being caught, yet want to go beyond locked-door scenarios. Unless taller skyscrapers surround the building, that is.
You could even squeeze in a quick romp on the roof of your apartment building, but be wary of who else may have access to the space. You might end up with a viewing party of your outdoor sex show, after all!
Hit up a sex club
For those of you who are totally into having sex in public and want to take things up another notch, try visiting a sex club. These are safe, regulated spaces for people who want to have sex openly, whether they are single or coming in as a couple. Typically, there are a variety of areas for people who are into different things (as just one example, an area catering to BDSM), so you can get a taste of and explore different kinks that you have.
More often than not, sex clubs also feature various bedroom-style spaces, where people can have sex. Usually, there are windows for spectators to peek in, giving you the thrill of exhibitionism without having to worry about its legal repercussions. After all, anyone in the club will know what to expect, and both nudity and sex are not risqué here.
Now that you know how to have sex in public, will you do it?
When done right (that is, when you don’t get caught for doing anything illegal), the benefits certainly outweigh the cons. Thanks to its intimacy building, the release of endorphins, and the simple fact that it diverges so excitingly from your typical routine, what isn’t there to be intrigued by?
Would you have sex in public? If so, would you prefer outdoor sex, or sneaking into an indoor space? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
