Hurry up... It’s Time You Finally Decided on a Creative Safeword!
Whether intended for use during BDSM or while exploring new sexual desires, choosing a safeword is crucial to having safe sex with your sexual partner(s). Unsure why this is so? Today, we’re digging into the topic of safewords to explain what they are, when to use, why they’re so important, and even guiding you on how to pick a safeword of your own.
We’re also going to give you 60 of our favourite safeword examples, which we welcome you to use during your sexual adventures going forward.
What is a safeword?
Safewords are a word or short phrase used to signal the desire to end a sexual activity because it makes the person feel uncomfortable emotionally, mentally, or physically. While it’s often used in BDSM relationships to foster safe sex between participants, it can be used in other sexual activities and encounters to create a greater sense of safety. For example, when trying out new things to keep your sex life exciting. In some cases where speaking is not possible or permitted, such as in vacuum bondage, a non-verbal safeword might be used instead.
While these words are typically used under sexual circumstances, they can also be used in conversation for long-term romantic relationships: safewords for arguments. In this case, folks who experience emotional, mental, or physical discomfort in the height of a heated argument might say their safeword to take a break, regroup, and settle themselves down before continuing.
Whether used as part of a one-night stand, throughout a friends with benefits situation, during a short-term relationship, or in a long-term partnership, it is a major red flag and relationship deal-breaker to ignore a person when they are stating their safeword. This is the moment where consent has been revoked, and assault is occurring.
Choosing a safeword
Choosing a safeword doesn’t have to be difficult and is a crucial step towards helping you confidently live your most sexually fulfilled life. It doesn’t matter if you’re one-on-one with a sex partner or attending an orgy or play party with multiple folks, consent is necessary for all sexual situations. It’s essential to know and understand when anyone involved is withdrawing that consent and wanting the situation to end.
Some situations where a safeword should be considered are when experimenting with new sex toys, trying out adventurous new sex positions, during consensual non-consent (a form of BDSM play), with sensation play (especially when using temperature changes, whips, nipple clamps, and so forth), and even as a pause to ease painful sex. Sometimes, something as simple as a break to reapply some extra personal lubricant is all that’s needed before continuing to fulfil your sex bucket list!
Keep in mind that a non-verbal safeword might be necessary for instances where a person’s mouth is filled or covered. These can range from anything from humming (as long as your partner can hear it) to snapping your fingers.
If you’re having trouble deciding on one, check out our list of safeword examples below.
Safeword examples
While it might be a quick and effortless task for some sex partners to come up with a good safeword that works for them both, it’s not easy for everyone. To help you along, we’ve decided to compile a list of 60 safeword and ‘safe phrase’ examples you might like to use, including some that are quite common.
Red (as a clear indication to stop immediately)
Yellow (to indicate that your boundaries are being pushed and to proceed with caution)
Safe
Safeword
Pineapple
Coffee
Book
Chair
Gorilla
Hedgehog
Cookie
Big toe
Amusement park
Winnipeg
Cardiovascular
Apothecary
Milkweed
RuPaul
Saggitarius
Big Dipper
Free vacation
Polaroid
Rose quartz
Snake plant
Pickle
Pumpernickel
Candlestick
Pumpernickel
Mickey Mouse
Gold frame
Violin
Deforestation
Die Hard 2
Tater tots
Obituary
Dwight Schrute
A Midnight Summer’s Dream
Iceberg
Hopscotch
Keanu Reeves
Beetlejuice
Mercy
Begging for mercy
Hufflepuff
Vanilla
Chocolate
Unicorn
Tofu
Tracheotomy
Obi-Wan Kenobi
Gandalf
Jumanji
Submarine
Enchanted Forest
Sprinkled cheese
Silly little cats
Flustered
Charging cube
Lipbalm
Notebook
We promise, picking the right safewords for you is simple! Remember the importance of being aware of your partners’ boundaries and that once this word or phrase is spoken, all sexual activity must stop immediately. Safewords are meant to (and must) equal safe sex.
With this in mind, go forth and enjoy all the fun, exhilarating, kinky sex that you feel comfortable engaging in! With a safeword at the ready, the world is your oyster.
In which situations, aside from BDSM, would you make sure to have a safeword in place? What are your tips for choosing a safeword? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
