How to Have Better Conversations With Your Partner
Over the years, it can become challenging to maintain passion in a relationship. While couples therapy can help confront issues between you both (after all, love and mental health can be intertwined), a more straightforward solution might be to start talking to one another more frequently and in-depth. After all, even someone who has incredible communication skills can find it difficult, at times, to come up with deep conversation topics to speak about with their partner.
Thankfully, talking to your partner is actually quite easy.
If you’re looking to have a better relationship through improved communication skills, here are our tried and true methods for having better conversations with your partner.
Ask about their day
A simple “what’s new with you?” can go a long way. Not only will your significant other have a chance to tell you about how their day has been, but it also shows them that you are genuinely interested in what is going on in their life. With a conversation initiated, you can begin switching to so many other topics from here.
Did they tell you about the new chairs they got at the office? Ask if they’d be comfortable to buy for your own home. Have they told you about a co-worker who has been super irritating and not pulling their weight on a project? Let them know that you can be a sounding board when they’re feeling stressed.
Have them tell you a story
Are you feeling unsure about your communication skills? Have your partner do the talking!
By asking them to tell you a story — whether a fun, fictional tale or a story about something interesting that happened to them in real life — you’re opening up the floodgates for a more in-depth chat. Feel free to make your reactions to the narrative known, jump in to ask questions, and offer your opinions on the story once they’ve finished speaking. Whether the story was true or made up on the spot, you’ll learn a lot about your partner this way.
Follow up on something they mentioned before
Talking to your partner is easy, especially when they have already given you hints on what to chat about! Reference subjects they’ve discussed in the past, particularly topics you are familiar with (and can create a back and forth dialogue with).
Bonus points if you use something they mentioned in the past to come up with some unique date ideas. Treat these with the same interest you did back on your first date — reacquaint yourselves and get to know each other better.
Ask them “why?”
If you’re really hoping to learn how to have better conversations with your partner, you might want to delve a little deeper. Sometimes, people give shorter answers because they don’t want to bore others with their stories or believe that others don’t care about what they have to say.
Asking your partner why they feel a certain way shows that you are interested in learning more and hearing what they have to say. If they don’t feel comfortable sharing at the moment — and tell you so — respect the boundary and don’t mention it again, letting them know that you are there for them when they’re ready to talk.
Remind them what you love about them
Whether you’re typically a hopeless romantic or not, it’s nice to hear what others love about you. This is why it’s important to remind your significant other of what you love about them.
These can be deep conversation topics, as they help build intimacy without sex by strengthening your emotional bond with one another. This isn’t to say that you can’t talk about the physical traits you love about them, like their smile or their body’s shape, but it should also encompass the non-physical things. Their sense of humour, love of animals, cooking skills, and so forth — whatever you love about them!
Explain what you want to do in bed
The truth is, sex is good for you, and it contributes to the bond a person shares with their partner. Thus, open communication on the subject becomes crucial. Whether you’re talking to your partner about your kinks and fetishes or just telling them about the things you’d like to try in the bedroom (or out of it, if public sex is a fantasy of yours).
Sexting can be a great way to initiate a conversation even when you are not face-to-face. You can gauge their reaction while simultaneously letting them know about your interest in anything from oral sex (like fellatio or cunnilingus) to butt play and anal sex.
Are you still wondering how to have better conversations with your partner? We hope not!
While open communication and a willingness to stop and listen to what the other person has to say is critical, finding the right questions and conversation starters is also important. After all, you’ll need something to talk about! We hope that after implementing the tips in today’s, you learn more about talking to your partner and about yourselves as individuals, too.
How do you think you can open communication more with your partner? What are some of the deep conversation topics you like to address when talking to your partner? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
