This Is How You Can Have Deep Conversations Through a Dating App

This Is How You Can Have Deep Conversations Through a Dating App

When meeting new people on a dating app, sparking deep conversations prior to meeting up in person can help you better determine who is worth your time and who might not be the best match for you. After all, encouraging open communication with potential dates is an ideal way to see if they’re willing to open up and be honest (a green flag for a potential future relationship) or unwilling to speak candidly about important topics (which would be a red flag to be wary of). 

Looking for in-depth conversation starters to better get to know someone you’re chatting with on a dating app? Explore any (or all!) of these topics below.

Find out what they’re looking for in a partner

having a conversation on dating apps

When having a conversation on dating apps in the early days, it’s a good idea to make sure that you’re on the same page. Find out what type of relationship you’re interested in before investing more time. Do you both want a long-term relationship? Short-term relationship? Friends with benefits?

Get to know the basic information about them

Some of the best deeper conversation starters to learn about a person begin simply and gradually build up from that point. Find out about their favourite hobbies and pastimes, if they have pets, their favourite places to hang out with friends, and other similar topics.

Ask a bit about their history

Before moving things off of the dating app, find out about their past. Do they tend to serial date? How long have their previous relationships typically lasted? You may even want to venture into asking them the reason they and their most recent ex parted ways. These responses can tell you a lot about what you can likely expect, should you decide to start dating them. 

having a conversation on dating apps

Uncover what their favourite location is

Sure, you’re on a dating app right now, but there’s a big world beyond your phone screen! A person’s favourite location — whether locally or abroad — can tell you a lot about them as a person. This is a question that can get some intriguing responses!

Discover what their deal-breakers are

In these early deep conversations you have over your app of choice, it’s important to ask about their relationship deal-breakers. This is where you can find out if the two of you will mesh well together. Maybe they’re a smoker and smoking is a deal-breaker for you, or you love to travel regularly, and they’re a homebody. Better to find out sooner rather than later.

Probe into their conflict resolution style

In a healthy relationship of any kind, conflict resolution is vital. After all, it’s completely normal to have disagreements from time to time. By determining how a person reacts and responds to conflict, you can better understand how they would act during such encounters with you.

Ask what they expect from a partner sexually

The truth is, sex is a big factor playing into most relationships; thus, talking to your partner about sex is important, even if it’s a potential partner. Don’t be afraid to use this time to touch on kinks and fetishes, as well as what your libido is generally like.

conversation starters

Take it offline

Having a conversation on dating apps is fun, but there’s only so much that can be said before it’s time to take things offline. By getting to know each other well in advance, there will be no shortage of things to talk about on a first date. All that’s left to do is come up with a unique date idea and remember the tips for safely meeting up with someone you met online.


Having a conversation on dating apps doesn’t have to be complicated or stressful. While writing your dating profile helps others learn about you to some degree, it’s after that ‘match up’ that you then are tasked with discovering more about one another. Using the above conversation starters as guides, encouraging more in-depth chats with a potential future partner is possible. In fact, it’s an excellent way of seeing if a person is worth your time — that is, that your personalities and values align — before meeting up face-to-face.

Often, finding out about other people can also answer some of your own questions, including, “Am I ready for a relationship?

Do you think it’s important to have deep conversations with a person on a dating app before meeting them in person? What are some of your tips for having a conversation on dating apps? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

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