Fetish Friday: Erotic Humiliation
A fetish defines the object of one’s sexual fantasies, whether it is a living being or an inanimate object. On the other hand, a kink describes the less conventional sexual practises that a person takes part in or fantasizes about. When considering either definition, both are typically viewed as straying from mainstream social norms.
Thankfully, recent years have seen the world become progressively sex-positive and, as a result, many fetishes and kinks are looked at as ‘acceptable.’ Though, not every fetish that a person has is understood by the general population; this is partially because of varied subcultures that often branch from a single fetish or kink. It can leave outsiders unsure of what it entails.
To help eliminate any misunderstandings and reservations, we’ve decided to explain the topic of erotic humiliation or psychological humiliation through verbal abuse. We hope that it will give you a better idea of what it’s like to experience this fetish, as well as what someone who takes part in it enjoys.
What is a humiliation fetish?
Erotic psychological humiliation can take three forms. First, is when a person becomes sexually aroused or excited when they embarrass, shame, or completely belittle another person (or people). Second, when someone gets off being on the receiving end of said humiliation. The third option is when people are aroused by watching it happen between other people, either in-person or on a video (such as pornography or a live stream).
Common misconceptions
While erotic humiliation can be an accompaniment to physical acts of BDSM, many people enjoy experiencing the verbal abuse aspect on its own. What’s more, it isn’t always so extreme; some people prefer less severe forms of verbal abuse, such as being called a ‘slut’ or ‘whore’ during different forms of sexual play. There is no cookie-cutter method of how psychological humiliation needs to take shape, and thus, you can’t expect any person to fit into a particular set of rules.
How to talk about it with your partner
If this is something that you would be interested in incorporating into your sexual routine, be open and talk about your kinks and fetishes with your partner. Be clear about whether you want to be humiliated by them or to demean them — and discuss to what degree you are hoping for that to be. Just like any sexual fetish, kink, or act, consent between everyone involved is necessary. You must also be clear on what words or phrases you never want to be used.
Things to try
Once you have established the severity of the psychological humiliation you are hoping to give or receive, you can try a few different methods. Degrading references about the person’s weight, appearance, and intelligence are good starting points. You can also incorporate demeaning names as verbal abuse, such as ‘bitch’ or ‘bastard,’ regardless of the person’s gender identity. Many people also enjoy mockery of the genitals or breasts and having the receiver agree with the statements.
If you and your partner are into role-playing, you can also consider schoolyard bullying, road rage, and human pet (animal) scenarios.
Are there risks to consider?
So long as you are only experiencing or administering psychological humiliation — that is, you do not engage in penetrative sex or touching — you need not worry about the risks of STIs or pregnancy. However, erotic humiliation is often used as a lead-up to sexual acts, in which case, it’s vital to consider the potential issues that could arise.
Your best bet is to practise safe sex, especially with new partners, by using protection and exploring all of your birth control options.
How can I learn more?
The best way to learn more about any sexual fetish, including erotic psychological humiliation, is to talk to people who have been practicing it for some time. Whether it’s online in a forum or chat room, or face-to-face, someone with experience can prove to be a lot of help in getting more comfortable and understanding the ‘ins and outs’ (so to speak) of how to incorporate humiliation into your sexual routine.
In reading this breakdown, we hope you have gained a deeper understanding of what erotic humiliation, or psychological humiliation through verbal abuse, is. If ever the topic were to come up in conversation, you will (hopefully) feel encouraged to speak about it. Whether it’s learning more about the fetish from someone who experiences it first-hand or educating someone who may be closed off to the idea, we feel that we have done our job to help make the world a more sexually inclusive place.
Have you ever been erotically humiliated before? Is psychological humiliation something that you would be willing to try, either done to yourself or with someone else? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
