How To Easily Nurture Your Child’s Development
How do you foster proper child development? How do you nurture your child to help them eventually become the best adults that they can be?
Learning to nurture your child’s development is key to promoting positive behaviour and helping them grow as unique individuals, learn their strengths, set goals, and for your children’s mental health. While being a caregiver is not an easy task and presents many challenges, the following guidelines are an excellent starting point to lead your child in the right direction.
Love them unconditionally
The most important thing that you can do to nurture your child, first and foremost, is loving them exactly as they are. The positive effects associated with unconditional love can be felt regardless of age; during one’s formative years, they truly serve to shape the person a child will become.
When a child knows that they are loved in such a way by their caregiver, they will also feel comfortable approaching them with problems, talking about their feelings, speaking candidly about their hopes and dreams for the future, and asking for help whenever the need arises. Children who do not feel this sense of love may become too anxious or reluctant to turn to their caregivers.
Respect their boundaries
What better way to teach children to respect the boundaries of those around them than by actively respecting theirs?
From a young age, children are actively showing signs of setting boundaries. Whether it’s an explicit “no,” swatting someone away, or removing themselves from a situation for some alone time, adults must learn to acknowledge the restrictions that a young person sets up for themselves by not pushing these limits and going against their will. This also teaches the child that when they grow older and their desire to set new boundaries arises, these are okay!
What’s more, they will understand that the limits they need to put in place for their emotional and physical well-being are valid and must be respected by everyone.
Teach them that their body is theirs
It is critical for young people, from birth, to know that they are the ones in control of their bodies. The only way that they can learn that is by having this taught to them by folks that they trust. We often see caregivers forcing their children to give or receive a kiss or hug from family members or friends that the child does not want to show affection to. Unfortunately, this teaches them that they do not have the authority to dictate what they can do with their bodies, consequently creating a self-expectation where they feel that they must obey others’ requests in order to avoid making others feel uncomfortable (despite it being at the expense of their own comfort).
This can help set the tone for the rest of their lives, as they will understand that the choices they make for their body is theirs and theirs alone to make. By becoming aware of people who push the boundaries of their physical comfort, they will know to seek a trusted adult’s help when made to feel uneasy, as well as the importance of consent.
Talk about their feelings
Fostering emotional intelligence is crucial to child development. You can teach a child to understand and recognize the feelings of those around them by paying attention to their emotional needs. Establishing this is an excellent tool for maintaining a young person’s mental health, as it aids in conflict prevention (and, if a conflict arises, in its resolution), overcoming personal challenges, and effectively communicating their feelings and needs to those around them.
It is also important for parents to acknowledge how they feel in front of their child, especially when the child asks, in a way that does not make the child think that they are responsible for the emotions. For example, if your child asks if you are sad, you can say, “Yes, I’m feeling down today” as opposed to, “Yes, I’m sad because you didn’t clean up your toys when I asked you to.”
Act how they should act
That old saying of “monkey see, monkey do,” has been around so long for a reason. The fact is, children will imitate the actions and words of the adult figures in their life as they work towards developing their own unique personality traits and habits. It’s completely natural — evolutionary, even — for children to follow the lead of those they trust.
Therefore, when a child sees an authority figure, especially one that they look up to, treating others poorly, mocking someone’s weight, or slut-shaming a person, they will feel that they should act accordingly. However, when they see someone they trust developing a sex-positive attitude, acting as an LGBTQ2S+ ally, and speaking kindly to others, they’ll be more inclined to do the same.
Remind them of their strengths
Just as you wouldn’t want constant reminders of times when you messed up, what you are not great at doing, or even of your general downfalls — neither do children! While adults often can let things roll off their shoulders and know that others’ judgment does not change who they are as a person, young minds tend to latch onto these opinions and eventually begin to adopt them as their own.
Thus, if a child is exposed to these perspectives regularly throughout their life, they will begin to view themselves almost entirely (if not exclusively) in a negative light. Encourage your child’s growth by reminding them of their strengths and talents, encouraging their development, and celebrating their successes.
Encourage creative play
Giving a child the time to play creatively is an incredible way for them to let their imaginations run wild. Whether it’s role-playing with toys, creating art, or telling an elaborate story that they have conjured in their mind, encouraging this creative growth has long-term benefits. At that moment, though, it allows them to try out new ideas and even to indirectly express their opinions or any concerns they may be having with you, without stating it explicitly.
While letting your child sit and play alone is still highly beneficial, it’s even better when you join in, giving your undivided attention (that means no electronic devices) and fully interacting with them. This serves to strengthen your relationship and create moments of bonding between caregiver and child.
Allow your child independence
One of the best methods that a caregiver can encourage child development is through giving them their independence. Stifling a child, whether through over-protection, failure to let them work out problems on their own, or doing everything for them (particularly things that they can do themselves) can hinder growth.
Encourage your child to be independent, making it clear that you are there for them if they need any help or have questions along the way. After all, you want to give them the chance to better themselves and learn, not stunt their growth by refusing them aid. By allowing them the opportunity to work through things on their own, they will understand that they do not have to indefinitely rely on the assistance of others to succeed in life.
Discipline to teach (not punish)
Remember that the purpose of disciplining your child when they have done something wrong is to teach them why it is not acceptable behaviour. Relying on physical discipline to punish a child for their wrongdoings does not correct their behaviour because they understood where they went wrong, but instead makes them afraid to act in such a way again. That is, they do not understand the reasoning of why — as two examples — jumping on the couch (you can hurt yourself) or forcing another child to play with them (it pushes another person’s boundaries) are not acceptable. In their mind, it’s only wrong to do because they get spanked afterwards and don’t enjoy this punishment.
Structure a healthy lifestyle
Strive to create an environment where children can thrive on healthy food and proper exercise without developing a fear or aversion to certain foods or societally-prescribed weight ideologies. Teach children to love their body as it is: show them self-love exercises, reassure them of their inner and outer beauty, and speak to them kindly.
As a child grows older, you can help them learn about other health areas they must be aware of. This includes proper hygiene, good nutrition (to get all of the nutrients they need), encouraging ample rest and sleeping time, and, eventually, how to prevent sexually transmitted infections. Speak about the latter before the child becomes sexually active!
Never shy away from therapy
There are plenty of reasons to go to therapy, ranging from a traumatic experience that has left a person (regardless of their age) unable to cope with the aftermath, all the way to the desire to maintain regular mental health ‘upkeep’ during the day-to-day. While deciding to go to therapy is a personal choice for many, it should not be shamed or labelled as a fault.
If your child is struggling beyond how you can adequately assist them — and here, it is crucial to acknowledge your limitations, if you are not a mental health professional — present them the option of seeing a registered psychotherapist or psychologist to help them with their emotional journey.
Don’t protect them from everything
The world is not a perfect place, and therefore, you cannot expect your child to live the entirety of their lives without sadness, disappointment, or frustration. No one gets what they want all of the time! When seeking to nurture your child’s development, it’s important to remember that you cannot protect them from every negative thing in the world.
That said, we all make mistakes — it’s unavoidable, at times! Instead of feeling the need to take the blame for your kids’ falters or hiding the truth behind the penalties of their actions (no matter how large or seemingly insignificant), allow them to experience the natural consequences. Let them experience failure. It’s all part of the learning process and shapes their perspectives as they grow older!
Promoting positive behaviour begins when you nurture your child’s development. Not to mention the additional benefits: improved children’s mental health, the ability to learn right from wrong, to play their strengths, grow from their mistakes, and set goals for their future. The list is never-ending.
When you nurture your child, the possibilities are endless.
How else can caregivers strive to promote positive behaviour in their children? What do you feel are the best ways to maintain children’s mental health? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
