Fetish Friday: Paraphilic Infantilism and Age Play
A fetish defines the object of one’s sexual fantasies, whether it is a living being or an inanimate object. On the other hand, a kink describes the less conventional sexual practises that a person takes part in or fantasizes about. When considering either definition, both are typically viewed as straying from mainstream social norms.
Thankfully, recent years have seen the world become progressively sex-positive and, as a result, many fetishes and kinks are looked at as ‘acceptable.’ Though, not every fetish that a person has is understood by the general population; this is partially because of varied subcultures that often branch from a single fetish or kink. It can leave outsiders unsure of what it actually entails.
To help eliminate any misunderstandings and reservations, we’ve decided to explain the topic of paraphilic infantilism and age play. We hope that it will give you a better idea of what it’s like to experience this fetish, as well as what someone who takes part in it enjoys.
What is paraphilic infantilism?
Paraphilic infantilism describes the desire of being a baby, where diaperism (often associated with the former) refers to a specific fetish for wearing diapers. However, someone who experiences infantilism does not necessarily have diaperism, too. This rare sexual paraphilia typically manifests in the form of role-playing, whereby one partner dresses up as a child and the other acts as their parent or caregiver. This can be on occasion, in some cases, or a way of life adopted by couples full-time.
Common misconceptions
Being attracted to the idea of age play — even if this involves either partner choosing to wear diapers and act like a child — does not make the ‘adult’ in the scenario a pedophile. Pedophiles are sexually attracted to actual children, which differs from consenting adults playing a part and mimicking the mannerisms and behaviours of a minor. What’s more, adults into role-playing, who dress as a baby or child and adult caregiver on occasion, do not necessarily practice infantilism in its true form; instead, they could be having fun and experimenting with new roles through age play.
How to talk about it with your partner
Speaking about it to your partner is paramount for someone who has true paraphilic infantilism, as their sexual identity and fulfillment are likely tied to the expression of this fantasy. Be open and honest with your partner and encourage them to speak freely about their thoughts and feelings towards it. Ideally, you will find someone interested in playing the complementary role, standing in as your caregiving figure.
Couples who start getting into age play can begin with their behaviours and then slowly move towards the point where the ‘child’ can even wear diapers and be changed.
Things to try
If true infantilism is your fetish of choice, adopting it as a lifestyle and immersing yourself fully into the role play is common. However, for couples interested in casually experimenting with age play, here are some things to consider:
Acting childishly
Spanking as punishment for ‘bad behaviour’
Playing with kids’ toys together
Speaking in a higher voice
Asking for cuddles
Getting bathed in a bathtub
Calling your partner “mommy,” “daddy,” or “nanny”
Wear diapers
Are there risks to consider?
As with any sexual encounter between two consenting adults, both parties must be aware of the possibility of spreading or contracting STIs. If your age play involves sexual intercourse, there is also the risk of pregnancy (if that is a concern to either partner). Make sure that you practise safe sex by using protection and exploring all of your birth control options.
Because infantilism can often involve physical punishments for ‘bad behaviour,’ any scenario in which pain may be inflicted should have a safe word in place (a prearranged, clear word to signal the end of sexual activity). This is critical, should either partner feel uncomfortable and want to stop immediately.
How can I learn more?
There are a lot of resources for couples looking to learn more about paraphilic infantilism, including information on age play if that is something they want to try once or twice, but don’t particularly have a fetish for. Whether you want to see videos or images of adults who wear diapers and act childishly, are looking for fellow age players to build a sense of community with, or simply are curious about learning more, don’t be afraid to explore that which falls beyond societal ‘norms.’
In reading this breakdown, we hope that you have gained a deeper understanding of what paraphilic infantilism encompasses. If ever the topic were to come up in conversation, you will (hopefully) feel encouraged to speak about it. Whether it’s learning more about the fetish from someone who experiences it first-hand or educating someone who may be closed off to the idea, we feel that we have done our job to help make the world a more sexually inclusive place.
Have you dabbled in age play before? Is wearing diapers, or asking your partner to wear diapers, something that you would be willing to do? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.
