Penis Too Big? Here’s How to Make It Work
Let’s set the scene: you’ve found yourself a partner who’s packing more than the average, and while that might sound like a fantasy for some, it can come with its own set of challenges in the bedroom. Sure, it’s exciting—and let’s not pretend it isn’t a bit of an ego boost for them—but figuring out how to enjoy penetrative sex when your partner’s penis is too big takes more than sheer enthusiasm.
With the right mix of communication, preparation, and a dash of creativity, you can turn what might seem like an obstacle into an unforgettable experience.
Penis Too Big? Take It Slow
When your partner’s penis is too big, patience is your best friend. Rushing into things, no matter how tempting, is a surefire way to end up uncomfortable—or worse, in pain. Start with plenty of foreplay to get both of you relaxed and ready. Not only does it set the mood, but it also increases natural lubrication and helps your body adjust to the idea of accommodating something larger.
For vaginal penetration, arousal helps relax the pelvic muscles, which is crucial for comfort. For anal penetration, preparation is key. Start with external stimulation or use fingers and toys to help ease the way. Building up slowly lets your body adapt, reducing discomfort and increasing pleasure when it’s time to go all the way.
And let’s talk angles. Positions where you’re in control—like cowgirl or reverse cowgirl—give you the ability to set the pace and depth. Experiment until you find what works best for you. Remember, there’s no rush—exploring together is half the fun.
Lube Is Non-Negotiable
If there’s ever a time to make lube your new best friend, it’s when you’re dealing with a partner who’s exceptionally endowed. Natural lubrication is wonderful, but sometimes it’s just not enough to keep things comfortable, especially for longer sessions. Opt for a high-quality water- or silicone-based lubricant, depending on your preference and the type of condoms or toys you’re using.
Generosity is key—apply as much as you need, and then some. Reapply during sex if things start to feel dry or if you’re adding new elements, like changing positions. With anal penetration, lube is especially vital since the anus doesn’t self-lubricate. Skipping this step isn’t just uncomfortable—it can lead to tears and irritation.
Don’t forget to communicate. Pause if something feels off, and don’t be afraid to add more lube or switch things up. Comfort and safety should always come first.
Communication Is Sexy
It might not sound like the most seductive advice, but open communication is essential when navigating sex with a partner whose penis is too big. Talk about what feels good, what doesn’t, and any concerns you might have before you’re in the heat of the moment. Knowing you’re both on the same page can do wonders for your confidence and comfort.
During sex, keep the lines of communication open. A simple “Is this okay?” or “Do you want me to slow down?” can make all the difference. Don’t be shy about speaking up if something doesn’t feel right—your pleasure matters just as much as theirs.
Afterwards, check in with each other. If something didn’t quite work, discuss how you can adjust for next time. If everything went perfectly, celebrate that! Sharing feedback strengthens your connection and helps build trust for future encounters.
Position, Position, Position
When dealing with a larger-than-average penis, not all positions are created equal. Some angles allow for deeper penetration, while others keep things more controlled and comfortable. Spooning, for example, limits the depth and can be incredibly intimate. Doggy style might require some adjustments, but it can work if you angle your body to minimize discomfort.
Try positions where you control the depth, such as sitting on top or lying on your back with your legs pressed together. Experimenting with a pillow under your hips or using your hands to guide your partner can help fine-tune the experience to suit your comfort level. We also swear by the OhNut, a buffer of sorts that slides over the penis to make penetration more comfortable, all without ever sacrificing the pleasure of the penis itself (you can purchase it here and use the code BETWEENOURTHIGHS to save $7 on your purchase)!
Remember, there’s ultimately no one-size-fits-all solution. What works for one couple might not work for another, so take your time exploring and discovering what feels best for both of you.
The Mental Game: Relaxation Is Key
Sometimes, the biggest barrier to enjoying sex with a well-endowed partner isn’t physical—it’s mental. Anxiety about potential discomfort can cause your body to tense up, making things more difficult. Taking a deep breath and focusing on relaxation can go a long way in helping you enjoy the moment.
Creating a comfortable, low-pressure environment can help set the tone. Dim the lights, play some music, or use scents you find soothing. Feeling emotionally connected to your partner can also make a big difference, so don’t skip on the cuddles and eye contact—it’s not all about the physical.
If you’re still feeling nervous, take things step by step. Focus on pleasure rather than performance, and don’t be afraid to take breaks or change gears if something isn’t working. Sex should be fun, not stressful, so give yourself permission to laugh off any mishaps and enjoy the process.
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Navigating sex with a partner whose penis is too big might take a little extra effort, but it’s worth it for the connection and pleasure it can bring. By prioritizing communication, taking things slow, and finding positions that work for both of you, you can turn what might seem like a challenge into a rewarding experience.
Above all, remember that everybody and every body is different, and there’s no right or wrong way to enjoy each other as long as you’re both comfortable and having fun. With a little creativity and a lot of lube, there’s no reason why you can’t make it work—and make it amazing.